Oliver looked from his mother to me, then to the cabinet. "It doesn't squeak now."
"That was the idea," I said.
He opened the door once, tested the hinge, and nodded. Then he looked at his mother. "Is he the guy from the hotel?"
Nora's face changed. I could see her deciding how much to say, and I resisted every instinct to fill the silence for her. Finally she said yes, that was me, and that I had been helpful during a very difficult night.
Oliver looked at me with suspicion that was entirely reasonable. "Are you dating my mom?"
"No," I answered. "We're both dealing with some hard things. Your mom's been kind to me, and I tried to be kind to her. That's all."
He studied me. Then he said, "My dad thinks you're trying to take his place."
I felt Nora go still beside me. Oliver's tone was matter-of-fact, but the question underneath it was anything but. I crouched slightly so I wasn't looking down at him and told him I wasn't trying to take anybody's place. His father was his father, and nothing I did would change that.
"Then why were you there?" he asked.
"Because I found out my wife had been lying to me, and your mom found out something similar about your dad. We went to ask them for the truth." I paused. "I'm sorry you had to find out about it at all."
Oliver looked at his shoes. "Everybody keeps saying they're sorry."
"I can understand why that gets old."
He shrugged, then walked to the back to put his bag away. Nora waited until he was out of earshot before pressing her fingers over her eyes. I told her I hadn't intended to complicate things by coming in when he might be there. She shook her head.
"You didn't. Colin put you in his head before he even met you. That's what's complicated."
I considered offering to stay away from the shop. She said I shouldn't make that decision to manage Colin's imagination, but that we both needed to keep Oliver's needs ahead of whatever comfort we got from talking. I agreed. After that I made a point of arranging visits only when Nora could tell me it was a good time, and I never asked Oliver to pretend we knew each other better than we did.
At home the rowhouse became quiet in a way I had never noticed before. Without Sabrina's calls from the hallway and the television programs she liked to leave playing, there were hours when the only sounds were the refrigerator, traffic, and my own footsteps. I started cooking actual meals instead of eating over the sink. I went running along the river early in the morning and found that moving forward without a destination sometimes helped more than trying to sit still and think.