"I liked the attention."
"I liked everyone laughing."
"That's part of why I feel like garbage."
His honesty hit me.
Liam continued:
"I've known Simon fifteen years."
"He was there when my dad died."
"He helped me move out after my divorce."
"I kissed his wife in front of him because a room was cheering."
"I don't feel proud of that."
I sat down.
"Are you saying you regret kissing me?"
"Yes."
The answer hurt my ego more than I expected.
"Wow."
"I'm not trying to insult you."
"I'm saying the situation was wrong."
"There's a difference."
"Did Simon tell you to call?"
"No."
"Jessica did."
That surprised me.
"Jessica?"
"She's been sick about the whole thing."
"She gave me the dare."
"Exactly."
After we hung up, I called Jessica.
She answered on the second ring.
"Hey."
"You told Liam to apologize."
Silence.
"Yes."
"Why?"
"Because I apologized too."
My anger came back.
"Everyone is losing their minds."
Jessica sighed.
"Evanthy, I made the dare because I thought you'd laugh and tell me to screw off."
"You cheered."
"I was drunk."
"So was I."
"I know."
"Then why does only my marriage get destroyed?"
"Because you're married to Simon."
The simplicity of the answer hurt.
Jessica continued:
"I shouldn't have put you in that position."
"Liam shouldn't have gone along."
"But Simon literally said don't."
"And we made him the boring guy for objecting."
"I've been thinking about that."
"We were cruel."
"We didn't mean to be."
"But we were."
I hung up less angry than before.
That frightened me.
Because anger had been protecting me from another emotion.
Doubt.
That evening, June returned from her day with Simon and hugged me around the legs.
"Mommy?"
"Yeah?"
"Are you and Daddy getting divorced?"
My heart stopped.
"Who told you that?"
"Nobody."
"Kids at school."
"Hannah's parents got divorced when her dad stopped sleeping at home."
I looked at Simon.
He looked just as stricken as I felt.
I crouched beside June.
"Daddy and I are having grown-up problems."
"Are you getting divorced?"
"We don't know."
I should have stopped there.
Instead, fear made me promise what I could not guarantee.
"We'll fix it."
Simon looked away.
June hugged me.
"Promise?"
My mouth opened.
Simon stepped closer.
"Sweetheart."
He knelt beside us.
"Mom and I promise one thing."
"We both love you."
"Whatever happens, that's never changing."
June started crying.