“No, I don’t think I will,” I said.
She gave me a strange look.
“What do you mean?”
“You said I’d be here when you got back, and you’d tell me everything,” I explained. “I won’t be here, so you can’t tell me.”
“Where will you be?” she asked.
“Somewhere else,” I replied.
She pouted. “What do you mean, somewhere else?”
“None of your business,” I said.
“You’re acting childish,” she said. “Grow up. It’s the 21st century. Things have changed.”
“You’ve changed,” I agreed. “But I haven’t, except for a bit of gray in my beard. You seem to have changed a lot, and not in a good way.”
She looked at herself, still as stunning as ever.
“What do you mean?”
“You’re meeting someone for dinner, and you wouldn’t tell me his name. That sounds like change to me.”
“It’s nothing,” she said. “I love you more than ever. This doesn’t affect my feelings for you.”
“I can’t say the same,” I told her. “An hour ago, I loved you more than ever. But now my feelings are more of disgust than love.”
She looked offended.
“That’s disappointing.”
“That’s life,” I said. “I get disappointed all the time. Yesterday, on the golf course, I expected to shoot 85, but ended up with 87.”
“Why are you talking about golf?”
“It’s a frustrating game,” I said. “You mentioned frustration, so I shared my own anecdote.”
My attitude irritated her.
“Barnes, I’m leaving in 20 minutes,” she said. “Take me seriously and try to understand.”
“I do take you seriously,” I said. “That’s the problem. I realized you’re not a serious person.”
Her pride was wounded.
“I have no idea why you said that,” she replied. “Barnes, I’m leaving. You’ll see. Nothing will change between us. I’ll make you insanely happy. You don’t realize it yet, but you will.”
“You’re wrong,” I said.
“What am I wrong about?” she asked.
“That nothing will change. Everything has changed. My attitude toward you has changed.”
“What about Sylvia and Beck? What will they think about their parents getting divorced?”
“What the hell, Barnes? We’re not getting a divorce. What we do is none of their business.”
“I agree. Not the not-getting-divorced part, but the none-of-their-business part. Unfortunately, it’s about what’s happening between you and some unnamed guy.”
“You’re complicating things,” she said. “Barnes, let’s sit down and work these issues out.”
“No, we won’t,” I said. “I’m leaving.”
“This is more important than anything you have planned,” she insisted.
“I’m not sticking around. I decided a minute ago,” I said.
She looked ready to argue.
“Collins, you’re too late. The moment you thought I would tolerate your behavior, you lost respect for me as a man and a husband. It was too late.”
“That’s not true,” she shouted. “I never lost respect for you.”
“I don’t believe you,” I said. “Everything you’ve done since you got home proves it’s true. I’m leaving. You can go on your date. I’m done.”
I grabbed my jacket, wallet, and keys, walked to the door, and left.
She ran after me, but didn’t make it in time. I drove away as she opened the door and stepped outside.
I decided to visit Beck. She lived about four miles away, so I messaged her.
“Netflix and chill?”
She replied immediately.
“Want company?” I asked.
She sent me a heart. “I’ll make popcorn.”
When I arrived, she was already on the couch. Her dog, Davey, greeted me enthusiastically, nearly knocking me over with affection.
“Hey, buddy.”
I managed to stay on my feet and gave him a good scratch as he wriggled around, drooling on my pants and snoring with pleasure.
It took about 10 minutes to get to Beck’s house. By the time I got to the couch, Beck had already poured me a glass of wine and put popcorn on my plate.
I sipped my wine and looked at her.
“Not a word,” she said. “I like sweet wine. You don’t. You’re in my house. Deal with it.”
I laughed. “Hey, I tried to raise you right. It’s not my fault you lost your way.”
She wiped the lint off my pants, threw a plaid blanket over my legs, and snuggled in.
“What’s Mommy doing?” she asked.
“I’m not sure,” I said.
She gave me a puzzled look.
“That’s weird.”
“Yes, I agree.”
“What’s up, Dad? What do you mean you’re not sure?”
“When I got home from work, she said she was going on a date. I told her I disagreed. She said she would cancel it and we would talk. I decided I was done discussing it and left. So I don’t know if she’s on a date or at home waiting to talk.”
She stared at me, shocked.
“What the hell, Daddy? What do you mean by date?”
“Beck, I’m as shocked as you are. She told me she was going on a date with a man, but didn’t say who, and expected me to just be okay with it.”
“Dad, is this a joke? Are you sure you got it right?”
“I wish it was a joke. I don’t know what’s going on,” I said.
“I’ll call her,” she said.
Collins answered, and the conversation from Beck’s side was interesting. Beck didn’t mince words.
“Where are you, Mom? With who? You just lied to me. Dad’s sitting right here. You lied. What the hell is wrong with you? My mother just lied to me. Don’t call me. Don’t come here. When and if I want to talk to you, I’ll do it.”
She ended the call.
We sat silently for a few minutes. I didn’t know what to say. I hugged her as she started to shiver and then sobbed into my chest.
“She lied to me, Dad. She told me she was with you at the restaurant. She lied.”
“I know, sweetheart. It’s going to be okay. Please don’t cry, Beck.”
“How is everything going to be okay?” she sat up, her sad tears turning to angry ones. “My own mother just lied to me. She’s on a date. Daddy, what are you going to do?”
“I have no idea,” I said. “Beck, I’m floundering here. I came to chat with you to get my thoughts in order. I should have thought you’d ask me. I’m sorry.”
“It’s not your fault.”
She grabbed tissues, wiped her eyes, and blew her nose. She looked at me, then lay on top of Davey, who snored in objection. After a couple of minutes, she moved back to me, snuggling against me.
“Davey always calms me down,” she said.
“Hugging you always calms me down,” I told her. “You smell better than Davey.”
She giggled. “He’s a little stinky. Talk to me, Daddy. Where did this come from? What’s going on between you and Mom? What are you going to do?”
For a minute, she sat in silence.
“We should call Sylvia,” she said.
She pulled out her phone.
“Hey, S, where are you? I need you to come here right now. No, this is very important. I’ll see you soon.”
“She’s at Straps,” Beck said. “It’s a club nearby. She needs to take an Uber.”
We ate popcorn and drank wine, talking softly about what might be going on with Collins.
Sylvia showed up about 20 minutes later. She greeted Davey and then joined us on the couch. Sylvia, three years older than Beck, had always been close to her sister. Beck was a tiny blonde like her mother, while Sylvia was taller, with her mother’s hair and eyes, a slightly larger and darker version of her.
She hugged us both.
“What happened?” she asked. “What’s the emergency? I was at a party. Everything better be okay.”
Beck looked at her incredulously.
“That’s not good. Are you high?”
Sylvia laughed. “I had two margaritas and a cocktail.”
“Okay, Dad, go make some coffee,” Beck ordered. “This is serious, S.”
By the time I’d made coffee and Sylvia had her second cup, Beck had told her everything.
Sylvia looked shaken.
“Daddy, there’s more to this, isn’t there? Have you been fighting? Problems in the bedroom?”
“We fight sometimes, yes, but no more than when you lived at home. Mostly, we fight about you two,” I said.
Beck punched me in the bicep.
“Hey,” I chuckled. “No problems in the bedroom that I know of. If there are, your mom hasn’t said anything.”
“I need to talk to her,” Sylvia said. “Beck, you too. You need to talk to her. Daddy, why didn’t you stay and talk to her?”
“Maybe I should have,” I admitted. “I was too angry. She announced it so coolly.”
Beck squeezed me.
“I know, Dad. But we all need to talk to her. When can you talk to her without losing it?”
“I don’t know,” I said. “I hope it’s soon. I can’t take it much longer. I’ll go to the lake, try to relax, and get a grip.”
“I’ll come with you,” Beck said. “Let me get my bag and a blanket for Davey.”
She paused.
“Give Daddy a cigarette,” she told Sylvia.
Sylvia looked at me questioningly. I nodded, and she handed me a case. I wasn’t a regular smoker, but it helped with anxiety, and I felt I needed it.
Beck came out with her bag, took Davey’s dishes, and we headed to the truck.
Sylvia walked us out.
“I’m going to talk to Mom in the morning,” she said. “Beck, let me know what happens. Daddy, don’t do anything stupid, okay?”
“Maybe,” I said. “I’ll try not to do anything super stupid.”
Sylvia hugged us. Davey climbed into the car, and we drove off.
On the way, Beck asked a million questions. Some I could answer. Some I couldn’t.
We got to the lake house, took Davey to the lake, and walked. Beck held my hand. Some things hadn’t changed. Davey swam, chased frogs and squirrels, and we walked back.
It was getting dark. I looked at the booze supply.
“Want a mojito?” I asked Beck.
“Yummy,” she said. “I want some.”
I made two large portions. Beck lit the fireplace, and we sipped our drinks and talked. We lit a cigarette, and I felt relaxed.
“What do you think, Daddy?” she asked.
“I have a few options, but it all depends on your mom,” I said. “It’s pretty messed up. She might say she’s lost her mind and take everything back.”
“We’re in therapy,” Beck said.
I laughed. “Maybe I’d try it.”
“What if she’s determined?” she asked.
“In court, I guess,” I said. “But I can’t see why she would want that.”
“I have no idea,” Beck said.
“You’re smarter than me, Beck. You’ll be a psychologist soon. Why would she do this?”
“I have no idea,” she said. “People cheat for revenge, commitment issues, carnal attraction, or lack of fulfillment. But I don’t think any of those apply to Mom.”
“If she has complaints, she should talk to me and let me fix what’s wrong.”
“Yeah, you’d think so,” she said. “We’ll find out. I’ll talk to her tomorrow. Dad, you’ll have to drive me back to get my car.”
Surprisingly, I slept well. I watched videos until I fell asleep. I got up, got dressed, took Davey outside, and he wandered around for about an hour.
When we got back, Beck was already up.
“Do we have anything to eat, Daddy?” she asked.
“Not really, honey. We had to stop on the way here.”
“It’s all right,” she said. “You can take me out to breakfast. I want French toast at Gay’s.”
“Deal.”
We left Davey at the house, mostly asleep. After a big breakfast, we talked about hypothetical situations, school, my job, Davey’s antics, and her internship.
After getting her stuff and Davey, I drove her back home. I walked back to the lake, sat on the porch, and watched the boats. It felt lonely. I missed Collins and the times we sat together doing nothing. I missed Beck and even Davey.
I decided to go fishing. I took the boat out and caught six nice crappies. I cleaned them and found some frozen fries to eat with them. They were delicious.
When I turned my phone back on, I had texts from both girls asking me to come over to Beck’s.
I got there, and they were eating pizza. Beck brought me a beer, and we sat at the kitchen bar while they ate.
“Well, I talked to her,” Beck began.
“Me too,” Sylvia said.
“And?” I prompted.
“You’re not going to like it,” Beck said. “She told me she wasn’t happy. Not with you, but with her life. She thinks it lacks excitement and challenge. Some guy she works with is hitting on her, and she likes the attention. She wants to go on dates. She says she loves you, and you can date too.”
I sat, digesting her words.
“Sylvia, did she tell you the same thing?”
“Pretty much,” she said. “Daddy, I don’t think it will last. She’ll figure it out.”
“Damn, S, you mind this?” Beck burst out.
“I didn’t say I was fine with it. I think it won’t last long. She’ll get over it, and things will go back to normal.”
I was dumbfounded.
“What should I do while she comes to her senses?”
“Love her. Be patient. Let her calm down,” Sylvia said. “She loves you. She’s just having midlife issues.”
“Or maybe not,” Beck said. “These are midlife issues, not fun with other guys.”
“What other options do you have? Divorce her? Put her in a cage?” Sylvia asked.
“I have no idea,” I said. “Divorcing her is an option.”
“No, it isn’t,” Sylvia insisted. “Jesus, Daddy, don’t go crazy. You two are meant to be together.”
“Shouldn’t you talk to Mom?” Beck asked. “Tell her not to freak out. This is some crap. Sylvia, you’re taking her side, and Dad hasn’t done a thing.”
“I’m not taking sides,” Sylvia replied.
“Well, that’s a problem,” Beck said, getting heated. “You’re supposed to take sides, not this be-patient crap. She went on a date with some creep. You know he’s an idiot for hitting on a married woman, and she’s wrong for letting him.”
“Let’s take a break,” I tried to tone it down, but they weren’t interested.
“So what do you want, Beck? Our parents to get divorced?”
“It’s not about what I want. It’s about what Daddy wants. Daddy didn’t want this. Mom did, and she has to fix it. She can have what she wants, but until she gets her head straight, my relationship with her will depend on what I want.”
“And what will that be?” Sylvia asked.
“I want to see her as little as possible and not hear her at all.”
“So you’re going to dictate our relationship with Mom?”
“I’m not dictating anything. If you can’t see this is Mom’s fault, then you have the same problem she does.”
“Whoa. Let’s not let this get out of hand.”
I tried to hug them. Beck let me, but Sylvia grabbed her bag and ran out the door.
Beck and I watched her get into the car, turn the headlights on, then off, get out, and finally drive away.
“I’m so mad at her right now,” Beck said, furious. “I’m sorry, Dad, but that was crap.”
She pressed against me, and I sighed.
“Yes, it is, but it’s not Sylvia’s fault, Beck. It’s your mother’s. Kids shouldn’t be in this position. We had a special family. Our lives revolved around each other. I’m closer to you girls than any father I know. You always had a great relationship with your mother. You and Sylvia shouldn’t be in the middle of this.”
“It’s not your fault, Dad,” Beck said. “It’s Mom’s mess. But Sylvia acting like it’s no big deal is frustrating too.”
“Don’t burn any bridges,” I advised. “Let me talk to her. I love you, Beck. I don’t want you hurt more than you already are.”
She hugged me tightly.
“I trust you, Daddy. I’ll wait and see what happens. Keep me close, okay?”
“Always,” I assured her.
It was time to confront Collins.
Her car was in the garage when I pulled up. I took a moment to find my calm, then went inside. I felt a knot in my stomach and got a glass of milk to calm it.
Collins came out of her office looking as bad as I felt.
“Hi,” I said.
“I’m glad you’re back. I’m far from okay,” I told her.
“I know. I wanted to keep myself safe. Do you want to talk?”
I nodded.
“Here or in the living room?”
“Let’s be comfortable,” I said.
She poured herself some juice, and I grabbed some wheat cakes. We sat on the couch a foot apart, unusual for us. There was a hostile vibe.
“I want to apologize, Barnes,” she said. “I did everything wrong.”
“If you think it’s just about mismanagement, we’re wasting our time,” I said.
“I don’t understand,” she said.
“There’s no way you could have mitigated telling me you were going on a date. Do you get that?”
“I understand what you mean, but you don’t understand me,” she said. “I should have explained what I was doing to make it tolerable.”
“You’d need to be a wizard for that,” I said. “Do you have magical powers?”
She smiled. “Not quite magic, but almost.”
“Go ahead, Miss Le Fay,” I said.
“Think about it, Barnes. How old are we?”
“I’m 48.”
“And I’m 49,” she said. “I feel each of those years. Not physically, but emotionally. Remember when we were 25?”
“Yes, I remember.”
“Remember everything we felt? Alive, like life was full of possibilities. Love was new every day. Do you remember?”
“Yes.”
“Think about our lives now. We do the same things over and over. I love our routine, but I want to add something new, bring back some excitement.”
“I get that,” I said. “But you think we can’t do new things together?”
“I think we can,” she said. “I told you I’d go on a date and share the experience with you. You could do the same.”
“Collins, your idea of together and mine are different,” I said.
“What do you mean?”
“When I say together, I mean just you and me. Introducing someone else fails the together test.”
She thought for a moment.
“How long since you’ve spent time alone with another woman besides family?”
“About six months. Remember Kansas City with Amber? We met with telecom reps.”
She nodded. “I know Amber well. Tell me, Barnes, is there any tension between you two?”
“Not that I know of,” I said. “She’s gorgeous, but I’m married and 10 years older. We don’t flirt. We have a good working relationship and friendship. Nothing more.”
“Well, you said it yourself. She’s gorgeous and single. What if you took her out to dinner, hit the night, and danced together? Wouldn’t that be exciting, holding all that beauty in your arms? Wouldn’t that get your motor running?”
“Maybe. That’s why I don’t,” I said.
“Why not?” she asked.
“Because I’m married to you,” I told her. “I don’t put myself in situations where I’m tempted by anyone but you.”
“And if I was okay with it?” she asked.
“It doesn’t matter,” I said. “It wouldn’t suit me.”
She sighed. “I’d be okay with it now. I’m more mature. I’d put up with it, and I think you should put up with me doing the same.”
“No. That’s not what I signed up for. You promised me, and I promised you. If you want to leave, that’s your choice. If you’re determined, I can’t stop you. I only control myself.”
“I don’t want to leave,” she said. “I want to be more free and spontaneous, but stay married.”
“You’ll do what you want regardless of how I feel. I can’t accept that. You’ve been hiding this from me for a while. What else have you been hiding? And then there’s your stunt on Friday night.”
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that. I was mad when you left.”
“That’s a lie. You planned this long before Friday. You lied to Beck too. You’re good at that.”
I spat out my anger.
“You had your chance to manage this. My position hasn’t changed. It’s not about how you go about it. It’s that you did it, you plan to do more, and you want to do it. I control myself, so I’ll just get my stuff and leave you to it.”
“Barnes, that’s not what I want,” she protested.
“I’m not doing it, but you want to,” I said. “Right now, I have zero trust in you. You think I’m boring and need excitement. Even if you don’t act on it, I’ll always know you think that. We want different things, so let’s move on.”
I went to the basement, grabbed my luggage, and started packing. I took what I needed for a week, planning to return later for more. She followed me, saying we could work it out, but I didn’t listen.
I loaded everything into the truck. She tried to get in, but the door was locked. She stood in the driveway as I drove away.
It was depressing. I loved her and felt like I lost half of my heart. I couldn’t see a way forward.
I stopped at the grocery store to distract myself, but the trip to the lake brought it all back. I turned on a podcast but didn’t register a word.
When I arrived, I took my stuff inside in a daze. I considered talking to the girls but was too exhausted.
An hour later, my phone rang. It was Sylvia.
“Hi, honey,” I said.
“Where are you, Daddy?” she asked.
“I’m at the lake. Where are you?”
“I’m at your house. Mom called and asked me to come over.”
I got a call from Beck.
“Hold on. It’s Beck. I’ll call you back.”
I answered Beck and told her I’d call her back. Then I called Sylvia back.
“I’m glad you’re with your mom.”
“She’s in total distress, Dad. You should be here with her, not me.”
“I know, Sylvia. This is difficult. Do you want to talk about it over the phone?”
She was quiet for a minute.
“No, I guess not. Are you coming back?”
“No, I’m not. I’ll explain when I see you. It’s not good, but I guess it is what it is.”
“I have to work. I can’t stay here long. I’ll stay tonight, but I’m really busy at work. I don’t know about tomorrow.”
“Your mom works too. That’s not your concern. You do what you need to do. Your mom and I are adults.”
She snorted, clearly very upset.
“I’m so sorry, Sylvia. I know this is hard for you. I love you. You’re my first child, and you’ll always be special to me.”
She gasped.
“I love you too, Daddy. Bye.”
I composed myself and called Beck back.
“Hi, honey.”
“Are you okay, Daddy?” she asked.
“I will be. Are you okay?”
“Same here,” she said. “I guess you’re at the lake.”
“Yes.”
“Want company? I’ll tell you what happened.”
“I’m packed,” she said. “All my classes this week are online, but I have to work on Wednesday and Thursday. Can I stay the week?”
“You don’t have to ask. I’ll spend every second with you,” I told her.
“I know. I’ll be there in an hour.”
I got ready. While putting food out, I heard the sliding door open and Davey’s claws clicking. He was sniffing the food, so I gave him some love and the fat I trimmed off the pork chops.
As I washed my hands, Beck hugged me from behind. I hugged her back.
“It smells good,” she said. “No, Davey.”
She wiped his mouth and settled him down.
We started eating.
“I think it didn’t go well,” she said.
“No. She had lots of explanations. It boiled down to her being bored and wanting to feel young again.”
“Fine,” she rolled her eyes.
“If you were seeing Mom as a client, what would you say is wrong with her?”
“I wouldn’t consider her a client, but if someone came to me with her story, I’d say they’re depressed, facing a transition. There’s no such thing as a midlife crisis.”
“I thought it was real.”
“It’s not a diagnosis. It’s a transitional period. Some people feel their mortality and start doing stupid things to maintain the illusion they’re immortal.”
“Wow. Who would have thought my baby is so smart?”
She smiled. “Yes, I am. Don’t forget it.”
“Do you think she should see a therapist?”
“I’ll tell her, but I won’t get involved.”
“I understand. I’m sorry you’re caught up in this.”
“It’s not your fault,” she said. “I feel bad for you too.”
“We’ll get through this.”
“Yeah. We have no other choice.”
Sylvia arrived Tuesday night. Beck made potato salad, and I grilled hamburgers. We ate on the porch.
“Dad, Mom’s a mess,” Sylvia said.
“Yeah, pretty much.”
“What are you going to do?” she asked. “She wants you to come home. She promised to forget about all this. She sees the damage she’s done and is sorry.”
“I’m sure she is, in a way.”
“What do you mean, in a way?”
“It’s hard to explain. I need a minute. Girls, want a drink?”
“What do you have?” Sylvia asked.
“I’ve got stuff for Palomas.”
“Yum,” Beck said. “I want some.”
Sylvia did too, so I mixed the drinks and gathered my thoughts. We got comfortable, and I was as ready as I could be.
“Sylvia, are you still dating that guy Dickweed?” Beck teased.
Sylvia laughed. “No. I realized he’s an idiot. I have a new boyfriend named Richard.”
“Oh my God.”
They laughed hysterically. I tried again.
“Well, suppose Richard told you that you were boring. How would you feel?”
“Not good. I’m not boring.”
“No, you’re not. But if he feels that way, can you argue with his feelings?”
“I see what you mean,” she said.
“Beck, you don’t like raisins. Sylvia, you don’t like coconut. That’s how you feel. Would you feel differently if I told you you did?”
“No,” Beck said.
“Did Mom really say you’re boring?”
“Not in those words. She said a lot about how exciting life used to be, how we’re stuck in a rut, and she wants to bring that excitement back.”
“Do you feel it, Dad?” Beck asked.
“Maybe a little,” I said. “I know I’m not 25 anymore, but I like what we do. Otherwise, I’d be doing other things.”
“I don’t see anything wrong with that,” Sylvia said. “What did Mom say she wants?”
“To do different things, but not with me. She likes being pursued by other men and wants to date them.”
“Oh my God,” Beck said.
“How do I handle this? Can I tell her she’s wrong? Feelings can’t be argued away. Will excitement magically appear?”
“No, it won’t,” Beck said.
“Honey, do you really believe this hit her suddenly on Friday? She’s been thinking about this for a long time and didn’t say a word to me.”
“I know,” Beck said.
“Me too,” Sylvia added. “Dad, if she gets therapy and changes her mind, can you work it out?”
I shook my head.
“She thought she could just tell me she was going on a date and I’d be fine with it. That’s very disrespectful.”
Sylvia sank into the chair.
“I know, Dad. What if she’s truly sorry?”
“She said she’s sorry she didn’t tell me better, not for doing it.”
“I’ll talk to her,” Sylvia said. “Beck, can you help if she agrees to see a therapist?”
“I will if she asks for help,” Beck said. “But she has to want it herself.”
Sylvia left unhappy.
Beck and I stayed in touch with her, but Collins dismissed therapy and only mentioned couples counseling, which Beck thought would be futile unless Collins’s dissatisfaction was addressed.
“Are you ready for this?” Beck asked.
“No. I’m not interested in other women or sharing her with other men,” I said.
Sylvia asked, “What if you thought of it as a break and got involved with other women? Then, once Mom sorts herself out, you can get back to normal.”
“Maybe,” I said. “But what if, in a few years, she feels bored again? Besides, I don’t know any hot chicks even if I wanted to, and none are waiting outside.”
They both laughed.
“You look good for your age,” Sylvia said. “If you were looking, you’d have no trouble.”
“I’m not interested,” I said. “No, Sylvia. I just can’t.”
“Are you disappointed?”
“In a way, yes,” she said. “I hate it when you and Mom aren’t together. But I respect you for knowing yourself and sticking to your morals.”
“Thank you.”
After two months with no change, I filed for divorce. Collins called immediately.
“This has gone too far, Barnes. Are you divorcing me? You have no reason to.”
“What are you going to tell the judge?”
“I don’t have to tell him anything. That’s the definition of a no-fault divorce.”
“What will you tell others? We had a disagreement, and you divorced me?”
“I won’t tell them anything. It’s none of their business.”
“I’ll be there. We need to talk before it’s too late.”
“Do you want me to make dinner Friday night?”
“Yes, that would be perfect.”
I was finishing dinner when I heard the door open. It bothered me that she just walked in. We both owned the lake house, but I didn’t go to our house in town when she was there. I only got my stuff when she was at work.
She looked as good as ever, still making my pulse race despite my weariness. She tossed her purse on the chair and walked over. She wanted to hug and kiss me. I managed the hug, but the kiss was too much. She looked hurt, but so was I, for good reason.
“What can I do for you?” she asked.
“Everything’s ready. If you want, you can set the table while I get the dishes.”
We laid out the food, poured the wine, and she started.
“I don’t want to divorce, Barnes.”
“Why not?” I asked.
“Because I love you and want to spend our lives together,” she said.
“But why? You’ve been unhappy, remember?”
“I never said I wasn’t happy,” she said.
“You expressed your displeasure clearly enough.”
“You misunderstand me. I’m quite satisfied. I just wanted to add to our satisfaction by dating other men.”
“That made me uncomfortable. The simple answer is divorce. You can have fun with other men, and I won’t be displeased.”
“I don’t understand. I want to stay married and have fun with other men.”
“That’s not what I want. I don’t want to be married to someone who wants to date other men.”
We finished dinner and moved to the couch.
“So that’s it?” she asked. “Even though I love you and chose you, you don’t want to be married to me?”
“Yes, Collins. That’s right.”
“Look at me, Barnes,” she said.
She climbed into my lap, kissing me passionately. For a moment, I was lost in the sensations. But then I stopped responding. She slowed and stopped.
“What happened?” she asked.
“Have you met anyone?” I asked.
I already knew the answer.
“Yes, Barnes. Are you going on a date?”
“Probably,” I said. “I like being married. I don’t think it’s boring.”
“Could I be one of those women you’re dating?”
“Maybe. But I don’t feel the same way about you. Maybe I’ll stop being angry, but I wouldn’t hold my breath.”
She got up and picked up her purse.
“Let me know if you change your mind,” she said, and left.
The divorce was in court, and her attorney asked for counseling. The judge explained he had to schedule it if one party requested it.
“I’m not doing this,” I told my lawyer. “Figure it out.”
“I can’t. It’s the law.”
“What if we withdraw the divorce petition? Will he still order it?”
He was stunned.
“No, I don’t think he could.”
“Is that what you want?”
“Yes. Do it,” I said.
This surprised everyone, and Collins looked smug. After the proceedings, I told her, “I won’t be forced to do anything. Until you’re done with this, don’t contact me. I’ll never speak to you again if that’s what you want.”
Her jaw dropped, and I walked away.
She tried to talk to me for two months, even through Sylvia. Beck’s relationship with her mother deteriorated, causing tension between Beck and Sylvia.
Collins tried to come to the lake house, but I changed the locks. She even came to my work, and I had to kick her out.
After two months, she gave up and told Sylvia she would no longer seek counseling if I wanted to sue.
We did. We went to the same judge, and the divorce was uncontested.
She kept the house in town, and I got the lake house. The property was equitably distributed. She kept her business, and I kept mine. No spousal support, and we both kept our pensions. The usual divorce proceedings were boring, tedious, and annoying.
I started buying businesses and quickly retired. I fished, learned to water ski, and spent all summer on the boat with the girls.
By October, I applied for a visa to become a resident of Mexico. As a tourist, I could stay for 180 days, which gave me time to decide my future.
I winterized the house, traded my Chevy for a diesel-powered F-350, bought a luxury camper, hooked up the boat, and headed to Lake Baccarac in Sinaloa, Mexico.
The girls were a bit upset, but I bought them plane tickets to Guadalajara, promising beach time. They were thrilled.
I bought a five-acre piece of land near the lake, got utilities, and became a local. On my second fishing trip, I caught a 14-pound bass and was hooked.
Sylvia visited in January, and we had a great time at a hotel in Puerto Vallarta. On the last day, she asked, “You’re not coming back, are you, Daddy?”
“I’m leaning toward staying. You girls are the only reason I’d come back, and I’ll visit you often.”
“What about Mom?” she asked.
“I guess she’s mostly working.”
“She seems sad, not as energetic as before. I don’t think she found dating as wonderful as she thought.”
“I’d rather not talk about her,” I said.
“Okay.”
She gave me a sad smile. We shrugged off the bad vibes and had fun. I drove her to the airport, and she left with hugs and tears.
Beck visited in February and stayed with me in the camper. We spent three days at the beach. Then she wanted to see where I lived.
We drove to my place, and she loved it.
“I can’t believe you have such a beautiful place,” she said.
“It would be better if you lived here,” I said.
She looked thoughtful. “I have no idea how I’ll make a living. I’d like to use my degree.”
“It’s a business,” I said.
She laughed. “Farming? What does that have to do with psychology?”
“I got into machine tools from working at a farm implement dealership. It started with making harder pins for combines.”
“I had no idea,” she said.
“Well, there are ways to use your degree.”
“Explain,” she said.
“You’re a psychologist. You mainly listen to people’s concerns. Bartenders do that too.”
She laughed.
She stayed for two weeks, then flew back. I missed her, but soon returned to my relaxed lifestyle.
Six months later, she called.
“I need a favor.”
“If I can do it, I will.”
“I need a loan.”
“A big loan, or are you just short on cash?”
“A big loan,” she said. “I want to buy a cabin.”
“Is it an existing lodge? Does it generate income? Can I see it online?”
“I hoped you’d go see it. It’s 10 miles away on Lake Baccarac.”
“Really? You’ve checked the books?”
“Yes. It makes good money. They have a bar, so I could listen to people’s problems.”
I laughed. “How much do you need?”
She showed me a staggering figure.
“Wow, Beck. You went big.”
“Go big or stay home,” she said. “I’ll prepare a payment plan.”
“I said it should be pretty short-term. Once I own the business and show a profit, I’ll get bank financing. Right now, I’m like someone with no credit rating.”
“I understand,” I said. “That’s so cool, Beck. It’ll be great to have you here. I’ll take a look and let you know what I think, but you need to see it for yourself.”
Three weeks later, she arrived, and we checked out the place. It catered to fishermen, mostly from the U.S., and seemed like a great investment.
Six months later, Beck owned the business and ran it well. Davey became a local celebrity, and we spent a lot of time together.
Beck sometimes worked at the bar, and it was fun to watch her use her psychology skills. The restaurant was first class and always crowded, but there was always a seat for me in the kitchen.
One Friday night, the chef asked if I minded if another guest sat with me. I agreed.
When he returned with the guest, my jaw dropped. She was gorgeous, elegantly dressed in a yellow outfit that highlighted her complexion. She had a mane of glossy black curls with some gray, high cheekbones, and dark eyes.
The chef introduced us.
“Miss Valiente, this is Mr. Barton. He’s the father of the lady of the house.”
I stood as she sat down and introduced myself.
“Barnes, please. No mister.”
During dinner, she laughed, a low musical sound that captivated me.
“You can call me Nita,” she said.
Her English was accented but flawless, her voice low and smooth. She had already ordered a glass of sangria. I struggled to find something to say to this stunning woman.
“It’s pretty crowded,” I said. “Lucky they have this table.”
“I didn’t make a reservation,” she said. “Usually, Tomas finds me a seat, but tonight I didn’t want to sit at the bar. I’m avoiding someone.”
“Well, you’re safe with me. My mission is to keep obnoxious guests away from beautiful ladies.”
She blushed.
“I’m pleased to have a gallant protector.”
She laughed again, sending goosebumps down my skin.
“Do you dine here often?”
“Yes. Like Tomas said, my daughter owns this place, and even though I can cook, I prefer coming here.”
“Ah, sweet Beck,” she said. “I like her a lot. We’re becoming friends.”
“That’s good to hear. Do you live nearby?”
“I have a house on the Sinaloa River and also in Los Mochis. I’m pretty mobile.”
“Nita, I have five acres nearby with a couple of buildings, a truck, and a camper. I like that I can go anywhere.”
“You recently moved here from the U.S., like Beck?”
“I’ve been here about a year. Beck visited, fell in love with the place, and bought this cabin.”
“What brings you here?”
“Fishing at first,” I explained. “I sold my business in the States and wanted to travel.”
“What kind of business did you have?” she asked. Then she hesitated. “I apologize. It’s none of my business.”
I laughed. “No need to apologize. I made parts for companies like Caterpillar and John Deere.”
“Ah, the industrial tycoon,” she said with a brilliant smile.
“Not likely, but I’ve been retired for a long time.”
“But you are so young.”
“I was lucky, if retiring at 49 is considered lucky.”
“I’m not retired,” she said. “I could be, but I feel like I have things to do.”
“Like what?” I asked. “If you don’t mind me asking.”
“I’m a smuggler,” she said softly.
Seeing my reaction, she laughed.
“I’m joking. I own a pharmaceutical company that supplies prescription medications to the Mexican Social Security Institute.”
“Wow. That’s impressive,” I said.
“That’s why I live in Los Mochis too,” she said. “Maybe I should retire and become a slacker and dreamer like you.”
I laughed. “You speak excellent English.”
“Thank you,” she said.
We switched to Spanish.
“Tell me about Nita.”
She smiled. “I have many acres along the river, some horses, and lots of Gelbvieh cattle.”
“I don’t know them personally,” I said, making her laugh.
“I’ll have to introduce you to some,” she said.
I laughed. “You’re very funny. Can I ask if Mr. Valiente exists?”
“No. He used to. He died in a petrochemical plant explosion.”
“I’m sorry, Nita.”
“It’s okay. It’s been 11 years. I remember the good times. What about Barnes?” she asked. “Beck has a mother.”
“Yes, and another daughter, Sylvia. She’s three years older than Beck.”
I showed her a picture of Sylvia.
“She’s very pretty. She doesn’t live here?”
“No. She lives in the States with her mother. My wife and I divorced two years ago.”
“Is that a sore subject?”
“It was, but less so now. We wanted different things. She wanted an open marriage, and I didn’t.”
“I’m sorry to hear that.”
“That’s life. Say, can I take you to dinner next weekend?”
“I’d love to, but I have to be in Los Mochis until next Tuesday. How about the Friday after?”
“Sounds great. Can I get your number?”
“Sure,” she said, entering her number into my phone. “Maybe when you pick me up, I’ll introduce you to some cattle.”
She giggled.
I walked her to her car, a new silver BMW Z4. She kissed me on the cheek, and it felt electric.
“You were a charming dinner companion, Barnes,” she said. “Thank you for letting me join you.”
“The pleasure was all mine. I can’t wait for our dinner.”
“You have my number. Call me in the late afternoon.”
“I will,” I promised.
I closed her door and watched her drive away. She was exquisite, and she was going out with me. I felt high.
When I went to say good night to Beck, she was excited.
“Did you like her? Isn’t she amazing? Did you ask her out?”
“You set me up,” I said.
“Yes, I did. She’s perfect for you. Did she agree?”
“Yes. Next Friday. But I need transportation other than the truck.”
“You can use my car.”
“Thanks, Beck. I’ll need my own soon.”
The next day, I texted Nita.
“Two evil women are conspiring against me.”
She sent smiley faces with hearts.
“Resistance is futile. Beck has confessed,” I said.
“I can’t wait for our dinner date.”
She sent more emojis.
The days felt like an eternity. I hadn’t felt this way since high school.
I wrote to Nita daily, and she replied two or three times, sometimes skipping a day. Twice, we talked on the phone.
Talking to her was a new experience. She switched between Spanish and English, telling me about her day. It felt like we’d been friends forever.
When she got back, she called, and the excitement grew. I drove Beck’s car instead of the truck for our first date.
Following the directions, I reached a gated path with no house in sight, but found a call button.
“Hola, soy Barnes,” I said.
Nita’s voice replied, laughing. The gate opened, and I drove down a long driveway to a huge mansion on a cliff with a stunning river view.
A young girl opened the door. She was gorgeous, about 12 or 13, and introduced herself as Pia, Nita’s daughter.
“Pleased to meet you, Pia,” I said in Spanish. “You look a lot like your mother.”
“Do you speak English?”
“Yes. I speak English, Spanish, and French,” she said, blushing. “I know English better than French.”
“I’m sure you’re good at all of them. I want to take your mom out to dinner. Is that okay with you?”
She gave me a critical look.
“Yes. You are very charming for an older man.”
I laughed. “You’re a flatterer, and I’m not old.”
She giggled. “You must love Beck a lot.”
“Same here,” I said, taking her hand.
She led me into a large open space.
“This is Zanetta,” she introduced the older woman. “She takes care of me and the house when Mom’s not here. Would you like a drink while we wait?”
“What do you suggest?” I asked.
“I drink lemonade. We also have juices and adult beverages.”
“Lemonade sounds delicious. And just call me Barnes.”
“Okay, Just Barnes,” she said, eyes flashing with laughter.
She poured lemonade, and we carried the glasses to the living room with its sliding glass doors opening to a porch and a mahogany deck overlooking the river and valley.
“I like it here,” Pia said. “Let’s sit and talk.”
“Your mom never mentioned you,” I said. “Maybe she’s embarrassed to have such an impressive daughter.”
“She doesn’t tell anyone about me for fear they’ll like me more than her,” Pia joked.
We laughed as Zanetta brought more lemonade.
“Thank you, Zanetta,” we said together, making Pia giggle again.
“You steal other people’s thoughts,” she said.
“Everyone around me wears tinfoil hats,” I joked.
“We might have some. Should I warn my mom?”
“No. I need to know what she’s thinking to make her happy.”
“It’s a good plan,” she said.
“This is my first date in years,” I said. “I need any advantage I can get. Will your mom be ready soon?”
“She likes to make an entrance. She’ll be down soon.”
“Thank you, Pia.”
I heard Nita’s voice, low and husky, and turned to see her descending the stairs.
She was breathtaking in a simple, elegant white linen dress with lace at the neckline, sleeveless, with tan platform sandals. She wore a wide-brimmed white hat and posed to impress.
“See?” Pia brought me out of my stupor. “You’re very pretty, Mom. Don’t you agree, Barnes?”
I cleared my throat.
“Yes, Nita. You’re gorgeous.”
She smiled. “I see you’ve met the preamble.”
“Yes, and it was a pleasure. Pia, I hope to see you often. You are a charming lady.”
I finished my lemonade and walked over to Nita.
“You never mentioned this little beauty.”
“I wanted her to be a surprise. I know you love your daughters, and I wanted you to love mine. She’s my life, Barnes.”
“Yes, I can see that.”
We went to a nearby restaurant with a lively atmosphere. The food and music were great, and I danced with Nita, who was an amazing dancer.
Holding her during a slow dance was unforgettable. The drive back to her place was a blur of happiness.
At her door, she kissed me, and it was electrifying. Before I left, she invited me to bring Beck and spend a day with her and Pia the following Saturday.
Sylvia called me Tuesday afternoon.
“Dad, when can I hang out with you and Beck?”
“How about 8 tonight? We’re having dinner at Beck’s.”
“Great. Could you ask her and send me a snap?”
“Sure. Is something wrong?”
“No. I just need to talk to you. I always need to talk to you too.”
“Love you, Sylvia.”
“Love you, Daddy.”
Beck was fine with it, and we were in her living room when Sylvia called. After the usual conversation, she said, “Dad, Beck, I hate living here without you. I’m tired of dating idiots, hate my job, and Mom makes me miserable. I want to move there.”
“Really?” Beck was excited. “That would be amazing. Sylvia, can you get a job?”
“I think I’ve already found one. I’m buying the travel agency that books cabins on the lake, including yours, Beck.”
“Wow. You’ve really planned this,” I said. “Sylvia, we’d love to have you here. Are you sure?”
“Positive. I wanted to talk to you first in case you didn’t want me.”
She sobbed, breaking my heart.
“Sylvia, I’m sorry I made you doubt that. I love you, and I’ll always want you in my life.”
“Me too, Sil. You’re my big sister. Remember when you spanked Jamie Myers for picking on me?”
She giggled. “Yes, I did. He was a creep.”
“When do you think you’ll move?”
“It might take a month or two, but I’ve already started. It’s exciting.”
“I can’t wait,” Beck said.
We talked for another hour.
That night in the camper, I reflected on how great my life was. Beck had moved in, I met Nita, and now Sylvia was moving in too. Things couldn’t be better.
On Friday, I asked Nita if I should bring anything.
“Beck says you make great pico. Bring that.”
I bought fresh ingredients and made a big bowl.
On Saturday, we took the truck to Nita’s. I wondered what Nita and Pia would think of it. They clearly weren’t poor, and I wasn’t either, but I liked my choice of living simply. Would they think badly of it? We’d find out.
Pia ran out as we arrived and hugged Beck, then hugged me.
“We’re going to the river. Mommy made everything for the taco feast.”
“Yum,” Beck said.
“Come inside,” Pia said. “Mama and Zanetta are packing.”
She took us inside to the kitchen, where they were packing coolers and baskets. We helped, and soon everything was ready.
“Barnes brought his truck. It’ll be perfect for transporting us.”
Her phrasing made me laugh. What a delightful girl.
We loaded into the car with Beck and Pia in the back seat and Nita in the front with me. As we drove, Nita pointed out various buildings.
“It’s good to have you with us,” I said. “I would never have found my way out of here.”
She laughed.
“There are several places you can go,” she said. “There are barns for different functions.”
“What kind of buildings?” Beck asked.
“Horse barns, equipment barns, storage barns, livestock barns, and paddocks,” Nita replied.
We arrived at the river, where there was a gazebo, a dock, three jet skis, picnic tables, and a grill.
“I planned to heat everything up on the grill,” Nita said, “but we can use your stove, right?”
“Of course,” I said. “All the comforts of home in a small package.”
“I’d love to see inside,” Pia said.
“Sure. I’ll give you the grand tour.”
We put the taco shells in the oven and showed them around. Pia explored every corner, lying on the bed, sitting on the chairs, and checking out the appliances. She and Beck carried our stuff to the tables, giving me a chance to kiss Nita.
She responded with a passionate kiss that left us both breathless.
“Hello, beautiful,” I said. “I couldn’t wait to do that.”
“Me too,” she whispered.
Beck and Pia returned, and we made lunch. Everyone praised my pico, and we chatted for an hour before Pia suggested jet skiing.
The girls changed into swimsuits, and I put on my swim trunks. We quickly launched the jet skis.
“Can I come with you, Barnes?” Pia asked.
“I’d love that,” I said. “You drive, then I’ll take a turn, and Mom can go with you.”
When Nita and Beck appeared in their bikinis, I was momentarily stunned. Nita was especially breathtaking. She caught my gaze and blushed.
“Ready?” she asked.
We all got on the jet skis. Nita led the way, and we traveled upstream for about five miles. She pointed to a cliff with a rope swing attached to a tree.
We shut down the engines.
“Do you want to swing on the rope?” she asked.
Pia was excited.
“Yes. It’s so much fun,” she said. “You’ll swing high above the river and drop into deep water.”
I decided to give it a try. Nita held the jet ski as we climbed to the top of the cliff.
“Who wants to go first?” I asked.
“Beck should go,” Pia decided.
Beck grabbed the rope and swung across the river, falling into the water and resurfacing with a big smile.
“Oh my God, Daddy, that was amazing. You have to try.”
Pia went next, flipping through the air and swimming back like an otter. Nita followed gracefully. Then it was my turn.
The height was intimidating, but I forced myself to jump. The swing was exhilarating, and I plunged into the cool water. It was fun.
Nita and I watched as Beck and Pia took three more turns. Pia then decided she wanted to drive.
We drove back, lifted the jet skis out of the water, and sat in the sun with cool drinks. As evening approached, we packed up and headed back to the house.
We thanked them for a wonderful day, and I stayed for dinner.
“How are you feeling, Daddy?” Beck asked.
“Pretty good. A little tired. Sun and water can really wear you out.”
“That’s not what I meant. I mean about Nita and Pia.”
“Pia is a little doll. It’s impossible not to like her. And Nita, well, I’ve developed feelings I never knew I had. She makes me happy just being around her. She’s beautiful, warm, funny, smart, a great mom, and independent. She’s everything a man could want.”
“I know. She seems to like you too. She told me she thinks you might be the one.”
“There can only be one,” I said.
She laughed. “Just don’t screw it up. I put a lot of effort into this.”
“I’ll do my best. Thanks, Beck. Now you need to focus on finding love too.”
“I will. I’ve been busy with work, but my eyes are open.”
I hugged Beck and drove home.
Nita and I started seeing each other two or three times a week. Sometimes I took Pia fishing or water skiing when Nita was away on business. I fell in love with Pia as if she were my own daughter.
After four months, I was completely in love with Nita. When we were together, I was the happiest I had ever been. When apart, I constantly thought about her and dreamed of her.
We texted all the time, and she sent me pictures on Snapchat. We kissed at the end of every date, and I wanted her in every way. I was careful, as she was special to me.
Beck and Sylvia loved her too. The four of them, Nita, Pia, Beck, and Sylvia, often spent time together with or without me.
One Monday, I called Nita and asked if she’d like to go to Tulum for the weekend. She called back immediately, excited.
“Really? I’ve never been there, but I’ve heard it’s beautiful and has Mayan ruins.”
She was in Los Mochis, and I suggested flying from there.
“What about Pia?” she asked. “Is it just for us, or do you have a plan for her?”
“I was planning on taking her and seeing if Beck and Sylvia could come too. A family celebration.”
She was silent for a moment.
“Barnes, I’m very touched that you consider Pia and me family. I’ll be glad of that, and I hope Sylvia and Beck can come too. They feel like my daughters.”
“They love you and Pia very much,” I said.
“Do you love me very much?” she asked.
I paused, then said, “Nita, I want to tell you everything in person.”
“Yes, I understand. Sorry for asking over the phone.”
“We’ll talk in Tulum.”
I laughed. I checked the flights.
“One leaves at 3 in the afternoon. Will you be ready?”
“I’ll arrange it,” she said. “Drive carefully with my daughters.”
Sylvia and Beck could go, and Pia was thrilled. We set off on the drive with Pia as our DJ. We took turns picking songs, teasing each other about our choices.
We picked up Nita and headed to the airport. The flight was smooth, and Tulum was as beautiful as Sylvia had promised. Our hotel was luxurious and on the beach.
On Saturday, we enjoyed the beach and the blue water. In the evening, we went to an open-air restaurant. Beck and Sylvia took Pia to a beach party and informed us she’d stay in their room that night.
Nita and I were left alone.
We walked back to the hotel, and I pulled her tightly against me.
“Well, that wasn’t suspicious at all. I think we were set up, Nita.”
She laughed. “I think you’re right.”
“Do you mind, Barnes?”
“Not at all,” I said. “I love it as long as you do.”
“I’m happy,” she said.
I took her to my room, made drinks, and we sat on the couch with her snuggled up against me.
“Nita, you asked if I love you. I want you to know I love you more than I ever imagined. Since the moment we met, I think of nothing but you. You fill my heart, mind, and life. I love you so much.”
She looked into my eyes, her deep, almost black eyes full of emotion.
“That makes me very happy,” she said. “I love you, Barnes. After Eliano died, I didn’t think I could love again. But now I have you, and you own my heart. My heart belongs to you. I want to give you all of me.”
“Oh my God, Nita. I wanted this since I first saw you,” I said. “You’re the most gorgeous woman I’ve ever met.”
“I’m not afraid,” she said. “The only thing scary would be if you didn’t love or want me.”
“I’d have to be crazy not to love and want you. Don’t ever doubt it. You’re the most desirable woman I’ve ever seen.”
She chuckled. “I don’t need thousands of men. Just one.”
After that, we made love and went to bed.
I woke to the sun streaming through the curtain and Nita sleeping in my arms. She looked so beautiful, calm, and peaceful.
As we dozed, there was a knock on the door.
“Come back with a warrant,” I shouted.
It was Beck.
I put on my robe, and Nita pulled the blanket over herself. Beck, Sylvia, and Pia rushed in with a cart full of breakfast. Beck and Sylvia jumped on the bed with Nita, laughing and talking.
Pia sat on my lap, her midnight hair swirling around us.
“You love her, don’t you?” Pia asked.
“I love you, and I love her too,” I said, hugging her tightly.
“I want to be your daughter like Beck and Sylvia,” she said.
Tears of happiness rolled down my cheeks.
“I’m honored you feel this way,” I said. “I’ll try my best to be everything you need.”
“Are you and Mom getting married?” she asked. “So we can be a real family?”
“There’s nothing I want more,” I said. “But I need to talk to your mom first, just the two of us. And I’m not ready right now.”
I leaned in and whispered, “I don’t have a ring.”
“Oh, I understand.”
We had breakfast and then hurried to catch the shuttle to the Mayan ruins. The site was awe-inspiring, made even more special by having Nita and Pia with me.
We flew back Monday morning, tired but happy. We dropped Nita off, and I took the girls ring shopping.
We found a jeweler from the Nahua tribe with a large collection of stones. We chose a red-orange fire opal surrounded by four small diamonds. The jeweler said he could make it in two weeks and send it to me.
I told Nita I wanted to go back to the gazebo by the river. She seemed to know what it was about, but just told me to come.
Pia was excited and had to retreat to her room to avoid giving it away.
In the gazebo, I knelt down, and Nita’s hand went to her mouth.
“Nita, I’m not good at speeches, but I love you with all my heart. I don’t want to live without you and Pia in my life. Will you marry me? I’ll do everything to make sure you never regret it.”
I opened the box, and she held out her hand. I put the ring on, and she said, “Yes, Barnes. I want to be your wife. I want to love you always.”
She admired the ring.
“I can’t believe you got a fire opal, my favorite stone.”
“A little birdie told me,” I said.
“I think I know that bird,” she said, tears of happiness in her eyes.
When we got back to the house, Pia was already waiting and ran between us in excitement.
“I can’t believe it. You’re going to be my father, Barnes.”
She burst into tears.
I knelt down and hugged her.
“I thought this would make you happy, baby girl.”
She pressed against me.
“Yeah, I just... I was hoping. I thought we’d never find anyone.”
“You found me,” I told her. “I’ll never let you go, Pia.”
She clung to me and sobbed for a few minutes.
“It’s so fire,” she said.
I laughed. “You’ve been hanging out with Beck too much. You’re starting to sound like her.”
She chuckled. “She’s teaching me lots of good words.”
We set the wedding date for December 5th. When Nita walked down the aisle in gold, I was the happiest person in the world. She said she had worn white before and wanted to break tradition.
I moved in with her, but we kept the camper for vacations. I removed it from the truck, which we used for its intended purpose.
I had never been happier.
The only hiccup came in our second year when Sylvia said she needed to talk. We were sitting on the deck when she said, “Mom wants to visit.”
I sighed. “I guess it was bound to happen. When is she coming?”
“For Christmas,” she said.
“Sylvia, what do you want, dear?” I asked.
She hesitated. “I wanted to spend Christmas here with you and Beck. Now I have to spend part of it with Mom. Beck doesn’t want to, so I’ll stay with her. I still love Mom, Dad. I’m sorry if this disappoints you, but I remember all the good things.”
I hugged her.
“I’m not disappointed. I’m proud of you. It’s going to be okay. You can still spend time here. Tell your mom you already have plans for Christmas dinner. She’ll have to deal with it. It’s her fault, not yours.”
“It’s hard,” she said. “I just wanted you to know. What if she wants to talk to you, to see you?”
“Let me talk to Nita,” I said. “She’s smarter than me. Let’s see what she says.”
Sylvia spent the rest of the day with me and Pia, and we had dinner together before she left.
When Nita returned from Los Mochis, I told her about Sylvia’s visit. We sat on the sofa watching the fire, and she sipped her wine thoughtfully.
“What do you think of meeting her, Barnes?” she asked.
“I suppose it was inevitable. She’s the girls’ mother. I don’t have any special feelings for her. I loved her for years, but she ruined it. All the good times are overshadowed by the way it ended.”
She snuggled closer and rested her cheek against my arm.
“I think we should all have dinner together at the cabin. I want to get to know her, Barnes.”
“Really?” I asked.
“Yes. She’s been a part of your life and the girls’ lives. I can meet her myself.”
It made me nervous, but Nita was independent and did what she thought was best.
When Collins arrived, she stayed in Beck’s cabin. I saw the girls less often, assuming they were spending time with her. Nita did meet her, and if there were any issues, she didn’t mention them.
I asked Nita what she thought.
“I like her,” Nita said.
“Really?”
“Yes. She’s changed a lot. Sylvia and Beck agree. She’s become introspective and friendly with us.”
“That’s good, isn’t it?” I asked.
“I think so. We talked about you.”
“God, I hope you weren’t listening,” I said.
She laughed. “She only said good things about you.”
I snorted. “I’ll just argue.”
She smiled. “She didn’t admire your stubbornness, of course.”
“Right,” I said. “But you’re still here with me.”
“Absolutely. I adore you, Barnes. That’s never going to change.”
Pia came in and snuggled with us, and I hugged my two girls.
Two days before Christmas, it rained heavily, causing the river to rise. We had to save the dock, carrying it up three times overnight. The water also knocked down two sections of our fence, and I fixed it early Christmas morning with the help of a laborer.
We planned to eat at 2:00, and I expected Sylvia and Beck to arrive by then. After finishing the fence, I showered and changed.
When I was ready, I looked for the girls but couldn’t find them, although Sylvia’s car was there. I made spiced rum punch and cider, then heard voices at the entrance.
Pia ran in and sat next to me. Davey lay across our legs, sighing contentedly.
“That smells good,” Pia said.
“It’s rum punch,” I said.
She took a sip and wrinkled her nose.
“Ew. It smells better than it tastes.”
I laughed. “It’s an acquired taste. Try the spiced cider instead.”
She took a cup, and Beck walked in. She liked the rum punch.
Sylvia followed, and then my jaw dropped as Nita walked in holding Collins’s hand.
They saw my reaction, and Nita hurried over.
“Don’t be angry, Barnes. Collins didn’t have anywhere to go, so I invited her.”
I wasn’t angry, but not thrilled either.
Nita pulled me to Collins.
“Collins wants to talk to you,” she said.
I offered Collins cider or punch. She chose cider, and we walked to the office. I sat in my chair, and she took Nita’s.
“You look good, Barnes,” she said.
“Thanks. You too,” I replied.
She looked great, even a bit thinner.
“I need to apologize, Barnes,” she said. “I was selfish and disrespected you. I know I caused pain, and I don’t deserve forgiveness, but I hope you can forgive me.”
“I’ve thought it through,” I said. “There were consequences, but one of them was releasing me to find what I have now. I was bitter and resentful, but now I’m not. I’m sorry I caused you pain.”
I took a deep breath.
“I forgive you,” I said. “You know Nita and Pia. They’re dear to me, and Sylvia and Beck love them. You’ll always be their mother. You’re welcome here anytime. Nita and the girls say you’ve changed. I hope you live a happy life. I’m going to, and if you can accept that, I’ll think well of you.”
“Can we be friends?” she asked.
“We’ll see,” I said. “But no nonsense.”
She laughed. “No, I won’t. You’ve landed on your feet, Barnes. I’m still finding mine.”
Nita knocked.
“We’re ready to eat,” she said.
We sat at the big table. Pia said grace, and the air filled with laughter and happy voices. I looked at Nita, who smiled and winked. Pia sneaked bits of food to Davey, and my daughters chatted nonstop.
Collins seemed to be enjoying herself.
It was going to be a good Christmas.