Claire did not disagree. There was no reason to romanticize what Lily or her family had endured. She nodded, and the two of them returned to the unit, where an eight-year-old girl's slowly strengthening heart had become the focus of more hope than the machines around her could measure.
The morning the team decided Lily might be ready to come off temporary mechanical support, Jack woke before five and discovered that he had forgotten how to be sleepy. He had spent so many nights fearing the next alarm that the possibility of good news felt almost as frightening. He showered in the family accommodation room Denise had helped arrange, shaved for the first time in days, and put on the clean plaid shirt Rose had brought from home. When he looked in the mirror, he saw a man who resembled the father Lily knew, though the lines around his eyes seemed to have deepened in just a few weeks.
Dr. Shaw met him shortly after sunrise with Claire and the critical-care attending. They reviewed Lily's latest assessments and explained why the team believed it was reasonable to proceed. Her heart was performing better under controlled testing, other important measures were reassuring, and they had a careful plan if she needed renewed assistance. There were still risks, and the next hours would require close monitoring. Jack asked them to explain what would happen before, during, and after the procedure, and they answered every question without hurrying.
"I know you can't promise me anything," he said when they were finished. "I just want you to know she hates loud noises when she's waking up. And if she gets confused, she looks for the yellow rabbit."
Leah, standing beside the bed, nodded. "Commander Flops is ready for duty."
Jack laughed, surprised by the sound. He went to Lily, bent close, and rested his forehead gently against hers. "They're going to try something important today, sweetheart. I wish I could explain it the way you explain all those planets to me. But you've got the best crew I know, and I'll be waiting right outside."
The hours that followed did not pass in any recognizable order. Jack sat beside Luke and Rose while the hospital carried on around them. A volunteer brought coffee. A janitor changed the liner in a trash can. Somebody's phone played a cheerful ringtone that made Jack want to shout, and then he felt guilty for resenting a sound that belonged to somebody else's ordinary day.
He opened Lily's letter, read the instructions, and counted to ten. He did it again when the clock reached eleven, and once more when a nurse came to say the team was continuing the procedure as planned. Luke tried to distract him with a story about a forklift accident at work that had left an entire warehouse covered in packing peanuts. Jack listened to half the story, then realized he could not remember how it ended.