Her relief disappeared.
“How long?”
“Two weeks.”
“You’ve been planning to leave me for two weeks?”
“I’ve been preparing to separate after you lied to my face.”
“You were acting normal.”
Amanda made a small disbelieving sound.
Leah turned.
“Stay out of this.”
Amanda crossed her arms.
“No.”
I looked at Leah.
“You acted normal too.”
“That’s different.”
“How?”
She had no answer.
I pointed toward the photo.
“You kissed him.”
“I know.”
“You lied.”
“I know.”
“I asked you to step away from him.”
She wiped her face.
“I know.”
“You refused.”
“Yes.”
“You told him our marriage was basically over.”
“I was trying to explain what was happening.”
“What was happening?”
She shouted suddenly:
“I was unhappy.”
The words echoed.
There it was.
Not new.
But finally direct.
I lowered my voice.
“So was I.”
That stopped her.
Leah stared.
“I didn’t know that.”
“You never asked.”
“I asked you all the time.”
“No.”
“You asked why I wasn’t more fun.”
“Why I worked too much.”
“Why I wanted plans.”
“You did not ask whether I felt loved.”
Her face crumpled.
Amanda looked away.
I continued.
“We had problems.”
“Yes.”
“I own mine.”
Leah nodded quickly.
“I became distant.”
“I used work as an excuse not to deal with conflict.”
“I stopped initiating things.”
“I let your jokes go because arguing felt exhausting.”
Tears rolled down Leah’s face.
“Then you understand.”
“No.”
Her eyes lifted.
“I understand why our marriage was unhappy.”
I pointed toward the photograph.
“I do not understand why that made lying acceptable.”
She sat down.
Hard.
At the kitchen table.
“I felt dead.”
The sentence surprised me.
“What?”
“With us.”
She looked at her hands.
“Everything became routine.”
“Work.”
“Dinner.”
“TV.”
“Trips planned three months ahead.”
“I started feeling like I was disappearing.”
“And Nolan fixed that?”
“He made me feel…”
She stopped.
“Wanted?”
I asked.
She nodded.
“Alive.”
Amanda whispered:
“Oh, Leah.”
Leah looked at her sister.
“I know how it sounds.”
I answered:
“It sounds like what it is.”
She looked at me.
“He noticed things.”
“So did I.”
“Different things.”
“What?”
“When I changed my hair.”
“I noticed.”
“You said it looked nice.”
“What was I supposed to say?”
She laughed bitterly through tears.
“Exactly.”