The first time I mentioned it, she seemed genuinely surprised. We were in my kitchen, still in separate apartments then, and I had asked whether we could keep Friday evening for ourselves because I had not seen her without her phone in nearly a week. She gave me a quick hug and said of course, baby, I wasn't asking for anything unreasonable. Two hours later, Tasha had trouble with a guy she was talking to, and Marissa spent our dinner at the window, whispering into her phone while the food went cold.
When she came back to the table, she looked exhausted but satisfied. Tasha had been worried the guy was losing interest, and now the entire group had decided on a strategy involving a carefully timed response and no more than one emoji. I asked if Tasha was all right, because I thought something serious had happened. Marissa said she was fine now, then looked offended when I said I'd assumed it was an emergency.
I should have recognized the difference between caring about friends and being constantly available to them. But I had no desire to become the boyfriend who counted his girlfriend's messages or demanded an explanation for every plan. I knew how quickly a reasonable concern could turn into a possessive habit, and I didn't want that for either of us. So I adjusted my expectations and told myself the crowded calendar was temporary.
The decision to move in together came after a weekend when her apartment building lost hot water and she spent three nights at mine. We were good together in domestic ways that had nothing to do with crowded bars or public photographs. She folded laundry while I cooked, we argued amiably about where the mugs belonged, and we could lie beside each other reading without needing to fill the silence. When she suggested finding a larger place at the end of my lease, it felt like the natural next step.
We found a two-bedroom apartment above a small row of shops, twenty minutes from my office. The second bedroom would be a shared workroom, with a desk for my laptop and a small corner where Marissa could keep art supplies she rarely had time to use. We signed the lease together and agreed to split the rent, utilities, groceries, and routine household expenses evenly. I liked that neither of us had to feel indebted to the other, and I liked imagining the place becoming ours.
On moving day, the squad arrived with iced coffees, an enormous portable speaker, and almost no interest in carrying boxes. Khloe supervised from the sofa, Finn disappeared to collect lunch and returned ninety minutes later, and Tasha filmed a tour of the unfinished rooms for a private story. Adrien carried heavy furniture with me, which earned him a permanent place in my good books. Marissa spent most of the afternoon laughing, and I remember thinking that all our lives might fit together after all.