I had read the thinking.
“About what?”
“Us.”
“Okay.”
“And the wedding.”
I waited.
Emma looked at the floor.
“I love you.”
There it was.
The preface people use when they know the next sentence will hurt.
“But?”
“I don’t know.”
I nodded.
She looked surprised by the lack of reaction.
“I feel like everything has been moving really fast.”
“We’ve been together almost four years.”
“I know.”
“Engaged eight months.”
“I know.”
“I’m not arguing. I’m checking.”
Emma exhaled.
“It feels fast emotionally.”
“How?”
She struggled.
“I’ve changed.”
“Maybe you have too.”
“Maybe we’re getting married because it’s the next logical thing.”
I watched her.
She had said something similar to Alex.
Almost word for word.
“I don’t want to break up.”
she said quickly.
“I need you to understand that.”
“Okay.”
“I just think we should pause.”
“The wedding?”
“The engagement.”
There it was.
She touched the ring on her finger.
“Not end it.”
“Pause.”
“For how long?”
“I don’t know.”
“A few weeks.”
“Maybe a month.”
“I need space.”
“What are you doing with that space?”
Emma’s eyes flickered.
“Thinking.”
“About?”
“Whether we’re really right.”
I nodded.
“Whether I’m the right choice.”
She looked uncomfortable.
“I wouldn’t say it like that.”
“You just did.”
“I mean whether this relationship is right for both of us.”
“And if it isn’t?”
“We figure that out.”
I let several seconds pass.
Emma looked more nervous.
She expected a fight.
Maybe hoped for one.
A fight would prove I was afraid to lose her.
Instead, I said:
“Take all the time you want.”
Relief moved through her body.
Visible.
Immediate.
“Really?”
“Yes.”
She almost smiled.
“Thank you.”
That was the moment something inside me hardened.
Not because she wanted space.
Because she was relieved I had given it without making her reveal why she wanted it.
“I was afraid you’d think this meant I don’t love you.”
“I don’t think that.”
“You don’t?”
“No.”
Emma leaned back slightly.
“I just need clarity.”
“I know.”
“You do?”
“Yes.”
I reached for the folder.
Her eyes followed it.
I placed it on the table between us.
“I called the venue today.”
Emma stopped moving.
“What?”
“And the caterer.”
She stared.
“Why?”
“To confirm cancellation terms.”
Her face changed.
“Michael.”
“We recover most of the deposits if we cancel before Tuesday.”
“Why would you do that?”
“Because I agree.”
“With what?”
“We should stop the engagement.”
“No.”
The word came immediately.
“That’s not what I said.”
“It’s what I’m saying.”
Emma stood.
“Wait.”
I opened the folder.
“Venue cancellation.”
“Caterer.”
“Hotel block can be released without penalty.”